Do you love yourself?

Whenever I read books about personal development, I usually encounter the question “do you love yourself?”. I began to wonder how important really is that question to our lives. Of course, my obvious answer would be yes. Hmmm, really?

 Being an IT guy by profession was not that easy as you might think of. Well, not in my case, I guess. I usually work for more than 8 hours a day. And the setup of being the first to arrive and the last to go home was not new to me. Why? It is because I work with machines. Machines that are very important to the daily operations of our company and are made to run without being turned off – ready to serve its clients 24 hours and 7 days a week. Sometimes, I even think that I am also a machine and that I don’t need a rest.

 It was really not a problem when it started. What more can I ask for? I have a job and I really loved what I am doing but not until I slowly felt its effect on me. Being so occupied with my work, I even forget to eat sometimes especially when the machines I am administering are having problems. I wanted to fix it right away and I didn’t want to be disturbed - not even for a meal or a nap. But most of the time, it took longer than expected to resolve the issues. After finally finishing the tasks, I already lost my appetite and was very tired. As an effect, I easily lost my temper and didn’t get along very well with others in our office and even at home.

 I was infected by the virus called prolonged stress and I was suffering from its effects. Not getting enough rest not only had a big toll on my body but to my personality as well. I was even tired to wake up in the morning. Symptoms usually felt by people who were chronologically tired. How could you expect a very tired guy like me to answer politely on the phone or even return a greeting and smile from the security officer standing just right out of the door? My relationships were greatly affected and I became very moody. I wasn’t able to show simple acts of respect and love to others simply because I wasn’t fully rested. I overlooked my own needs and was not able to love myself.

 But, as soon as I started heeding the advice of my mentors to take a break and have enough rest, I slowly realized that there really is a truth in what they say “You cannot love others if you don’t love yourself”. As weird as my experience seem to be, it made me understand that before you can show patience to others, you must learn how to be patient with yourself. Before you can forgive others, you must first learn to forgive yourself.

 Right now, I am still doing the things I love to do and that is to play with the supercomputers and machines but I already learned to set my limits. Lucky for me, those machines were not offended or hurt when I snubbed them. But, what if it was your cute little daughter showing you her drawing? Or your wife who is equally tired but still managed to prepare you a dinner? Or your parents who just wanted to see you smile? 

Love yourself so you can love others. Get enough rest. Take a break. Relax.

 You can do it,

  Ivan jude